It's Your Call - Making Sexual Decisions

an interactive site
to help you make decisions that are right for you


(based on the software - "It's Your Call - Making Sexual Decisions")

Introduction to Values
Questionnaire: Exploring my Values

Click on the above links to learn more about values in general and to explore your own values and attitudes:

Introduction to Values

Our values are principles or beliefs that serve as guidelines to help us make decisions about actions, behaviours and life choices. They reflect what we value and how we feel about the rightness or wrongness of things.

As a general rule, when we act in accordance with our own values, we tend to feel good about ourselves and our actions. When we act in a way that violates our values, we tend to feel badly about it.

Our values are influenced by many factors, including our experiences, perceptions, parents, friends, school and religion.

No two people share exactly the same set of values.

Values may change over time. As we have new experiences and receive new information, we may re-evaluate our values and modify them. What we think is right or wrong in any given situation may change when we find ourselves actually in that kind of situation.

And remember-you don't have to try everything to figure out what's right to you. Thinking about the issue and listening to your mind, your heart and your 'guts' will help identify your values.

Questionnaire: Exploring My Values

Each of the next questions will give you two or more statements. Click on the response which reflects your feelings, and then type in how you feel about the issue.

There are no right or wrong answers.

To protect you privacy, the computer will erase your responses when you leave each screen. Typing your answers will just give you a chance to reflect on how you feel about each point.

You may print this page using your browser if you wish to keep it in your journal. That way you can refer to it in the future to see how your values change over time.

Questionnaire:

I like my body and would feel comfortable sharing it with a partner under the right circumstances.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I don't feel good about my body and I'd be embarassed for my partner to see it.
Strongly agree
Agree
Not sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?

 

I am comfortable with my sexual feelings and thoughts
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

Sexual thoughts and feelings make me feel uncomfortable.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?


Carrying condoms feels like I'm planning to have sex and that's wrong - it should just happen.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


Carrying condoms feels like the right, sensible thing to do, even if I'm not definitely planning to have sex - it's just a matter of being prepared.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?


Masturbation is a healthy, natural way for me to get to know my body better and discover what I like.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

The whole idea of masturbation makes me very uncomfortable.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I don't expect intercourse to always be a part of sex - there are all kinds of sexy, erotic, satisfying things you can do without actually having intercourse.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

If I'm going to be sexual with someone, for me that means "going all the way" and having intercourse.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?

I would feel fine about having sex with someone that I didn't love
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I need to be in a caring relationship before I feel right about having sex.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
Good sex should come naturally.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

It takes skill, knowledge, communication and practice to learn how to have good sex.
Strongly Disagree
Disagree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I've had a good look at my genitals with a mirror.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

The idea of looking at my genitals with a mirror grosses me out.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I know what I need and want sexually.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I don't really know what I like - I haven't experimented or thought about it much.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thought or feelings do these statements bring up for me?
Sex should be spontaneous, not planned.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

Planning sex can be an exciting turn-on.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?

A little booze can loosen you up and make you feel better.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I wouldn't want to have sex when I was high on booze or drugs.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I would never sex with someone else when I was involved in a steady relationship.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

To me, it's ok to have sex with someone other than my steady partner.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?



If my steady partner had sex with someone else, it wouldn't bother me.
Strongly Disagree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I'd be very upset if my steady partner had sex with someone else.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I feel comfortable initiating sexual contact with my partner.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I like it when my partner "comes on to me" for sex
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree


What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
I can't ever imagine ever wanting to have sex with someone of the same gender as me.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I would be open to having a sexual relationship with someone of the same gender as me.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

I would prefer to have a sexual relationship with someone of the same gender as me.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?
For some people, abortion may be an acceptable option if an unintended pregnancy occurs.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

Abortion is never an acceptable option.
Strongly Agree
Agree
Not Sure
Disagree
Strongly Disagree

What thoughts and feelings do these statements bring up for me?

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© 2001, University of Alberta Health Centre

adapted from "It's Your Call"
a free interactive software program downloadable from
www.ualberta.ca/healthinfo