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Edmonton Balloon Club Song
Written in 1982 by
John Bortscher, Guy Smith and Murray Scholtz

(sing to the tune of "On Top of Ole Smokie")

Updated: June 18, 2002

Welcome to High River
We've come to compete
Let's ditch the observer
Cause we'd like to cheat

On top of my half ton
Wrapped up in a sack
In front of a basket
With a fan in the back

I got my old Cameron
All filled up with air
I turned on my burner
And singed all my hair

The wind it was blowing
At 40 or more
The green flag was flying
Shucks I ripped a gore

It took off like a rocket
Then dropped like a rock
My tanks were all empty
Oh god! What a shock

It then hit a thermal
And started to rise
I saw my whole life flash
In front of my eyes

The girl who was with me
We were surely in love
So we joined the mile high club
From way up above

At the height of our passion
She let out a cheer
The basket was rockin'
Then we hit a shear

We dropped like a bullet
And passed through some trees
Right into some barley
Right up to our knees

We dragged through the field
And right through a fence
Set fire to the barley
The heat was intense

The farmer came runnin'
A gun in his hand
And in came the chase truck
All over his land

So we bought the barley
And he kept the truck
It wasn't a good deal
In fact we got....BURNED

So if you like ballooning
Come fly with us
But if you hate adventure
You'd best take the bus

(c) Edmonton Balloon Club 1982


The Ten Commandments of Ballooning

  1. Thou Shalt keep thy air hot, lest the earth rise up and smite thee.
  2. Thou shalt always fly with champagne.
  3. Thou shalt avoid landing in anything resembling crops, for these are the bounty of the earth, and sowers of the seeds may rise up and slay thee.
  4. Thou shall ensure that the thirst of thy fan is always satified with petrol.
  5. Thou shalt not criticize thy neighbor's balloon colors, for yours may not be much better.
  6. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's chase vehicle or crew.
  7. Thou shalt always keep bountiful supplies of propane in thy tanks, for this is the souce of thy light.
  8. Thou shalt always keep thy crew happy lest they forget to retrieve you some day.
  9. Thou shalt not fly into the midst of fluffy cumulus clouds, lest the shears flatten thine envelope and make thy heart skip many beats.
  10. Thou shalt honor the pronouncements of thine air traffic controller, lest the air intake of a Boeing become stuffed with many yards of nylon and much wicker.

From Moses Nagorski *1983*
Transcribed by Father Bruce Brown (Pious Piccard Parish)
Reprinted by Angel Marion *1989*
Sung gloriously at the Edmonton Balloon Club 25th Anniversary, Nov 21, 1998

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